But few of us realize that, far from being timeless and universal, romantic love … But preserve your Jewish, Christian, or Muslim roots. To develop compassion in ourselves, we need to practice mindful breathing, deep listening, and deep looking. thank you very much for this incredible post you shared with us. Finally we are beginning to be enlightened. Some commentators have said that mudita means ‘sympathetic joy’ or ‘altruistic joy,’ the happiness we feel when others are happy. We are loved by trees. The type of love that Paul describes in 1 Cor 13 is a love given by God, and Jesus is the perfect example. UPLIFT is dedicated to telling the new story of inspired co-creation. You must look deeply in order to see and understand the needs, aspirations, and suffering of the one you love. One day a Brahman man asked the Buddha, “What can I do to be sure that I will be with Brahma after I die?” and the Buddha replied, “As Brahma is the source of Love, to dwell with him you must practice the Brahmaviharas—love, compassion, joy, and equanimity.”. They are the four aspects of true love within ourselves and within everyone and everything. I really needed an uplift and I got it from here. During the lifetime of the Buddha, those of the Brahmanic faith prayed that after death they would go to Heaven to dwell eternally with Brahma, the universal God. Happiness is only possible with true love. 2. According to them, there are 4 qualities, that only a true love has, and we will have a look at all of them so that you can figure out if it is a true love that you feel towards your significant other. Maitri, Loving-Kindness Maitri comes from the Sanskrit word for friend. This example is often given: Someone traveling in the desert sees a stream of cool water and experiences joy. You look and listen deeply to her to be able to touch her pain. A vihara is an abode or a dwelling place. Yoga and meditation have kept the same simple tools for thousands of years. Love is unyielding. Later I discovered that the Buddha has enough understanding, calm, and strength; that is why the suffering does not overwhelm him. God’s love is everlasting to everlasting “But the mercy of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him, and His righteousness to children’s children.” Psalm 103:17. On drinking the water, he experiences happiness. But that is too limited. Embrace a life of love 1 Corinthians 12:27-13:13. With compassion in our heart, every thought, word, and deed can bring about a miracle. They are the four aspects of true love within ourselves and within everyone and everything. We have to put ourselves “into the other person’s skin” and become one with him if we want to understand and truly love him. The following is a description of the Buddha’s teachings on the four qualities of love, from the first chapter of Teachings on Love , written by Thich Nhat Hanh Happiness is only possible with true love. This is a most wonderful post ! One day a Brahman man asked the Buddha, “What can I do to be sure that I will be with Brahma after I die?” and the Buddha replied, “As Brahma is the source of Love, to dwell with him you must practice the Brahmaviharas—love, compassion, joy, and equanimity.”. Thich Nhat Hanh explains the Four Qualities of Love that can bring deep meaning to our lives. Love, compassion, joy, and equanimity are the very nature of an enlightened person. If we learn ways to practice love, compassion, joy, and equanimity, we will know how to heal the illnesses of anger, sorrow, insecurity, sadness, hatred, loneliness, and unhealthy attachments… Love, compassion, joy, and equanimity are the very nature of an enlightened person. RELATED VIDEOS. Effortless and Eternal Attraction. Here are 12 habits of happy couples who have found lasting love: #1 Support. When that happens, there is no ‘self’ and no ‘other.’. A distinction needs to be made between Ascension and Assumption. The more i study about buddha, my soul and my mind peace and calm. Spread your wings, connect the dots, and do all things you love to do, but do em with the power of love for both sides of the equation. 2. Sincere Love. We need trees to be healthy. True joy has to contain love, compassion, and equanimity. https://awakeningvisions.com/thich-nhat-hanh-quotes/. Compassion is karuna in both languages. True love always brings joy to ourselves and to the one we love. You say you love him, but if you do not understand his aspirations, his needs, his difficulties, he is in a prison called love. We all need love. The Brahmaviharas are the four elements of true love. That is upeksha. I have felt true happiness. You know the other person is suffering, so you sit close to her. Love, ultimately, is a practice. To develop that capacity, we have to practice looking and listening deeply so that we know what to do and what not to do to make others happy. A summer breeze can be very refreshing; but if we try to put it in a tin can so we can have it entirely for ourselves, the breeze will die. You must learn to befriend yourself before even thinking of loving other people. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Sometimes we treat love like it’s a destination. what a beautiful way to express true love and emotions! At that time the world to me was glorious life was beautiful. If you are cut off from your roots, you cannot be happy. Here are 16 characteristics of love from this chapter. If you enjoy walking meditation, practice walking meditation. Thich Nhat Hanh explains the four qualities of love that can bring deep meaning to our lives. From the Buddhist perspective, true love is said to consist of four major qualities: 1. We just have to open our eyes and we can see the blue sky, the violet flowers, the children, the trees, and so many other kinds of forms and colors. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. There are people who understand the nature of true love and how to generate and nurture it. This relationship with my true love transformed me and it was not smooth sailing and yet it was bliss. They are the four aspects of true love within ourselves and within everyone and everything. “A new commandment I give unto you. He is able to smile to suffering because he knows how to take care of it and to help transform it. Joy is mudita. Guest post written by Mariana Ashley of online colleges. – Thich Nhat Hahn In the 1950s, social psychologist and philosopher Erich Fromm wrote a groundbreaking book, The Art of Loving: An Enquiry into the Nature of Love. The teachings on love given by the Buddha are clear, scientific, and applicable… Love, compassion, joy, and equanimity are the very nature of an enlightened person. From my reading in 1 Corinthians 13 in the One Year Bible New Testament. If you offer your beloved something she does not need, that is not maitri. If you are constantly at war with yourself, how do you think you can live We are loved by the air; we need fresh air to be happy and well. Love brings us joy and well-being. Healthy couples understand that in order to receive their partner’s support, they must first give it. The book was based on a set of radio talks from 1958 which had been criticised in the U.S. at the time for their frankness about sex. Ditthadhamma sukhavihari means “dwelling happily in the present moment.” We don’t rush to the future; we know that everything is here in the present moment. Love in Sanskrit is maitri; in Pali it is metta. And when I began a relationship with my true love at age 46. Love in Sanskrit is maitri; in Pali it is metta. In the book The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, he explains the different ways people give and receive love: (1) Words (2) Acts of Service, (3) Giving Gifts, (4) Spending Time Together … The love make me grow stronger and calm. If you imprison him in a tin can, he will die. The Buddha respected people’s desire to practice their own faith, so he answered the Brahman’s question in a way that encouraged him to do so. Great words… if only the Rohingiyas were not in this world. Every one of us can benefit from these teachings. Battling PTSD and depression has made it difficult to create the self love and respect needed to truly love. There is a beautiful article, entitled The Four Qualities of Love written by Thich Nhat Hanh, which perfectly explains to us, love’s multi-faceted expression in our lives. ‘Love’ is a beautiful word; we have to restore its meaning. Maitri can be translated as ‘love’ or ‘loving kindness.’ Some Buddhist teachers prefer ‘loving kindness,’ as they find the word ‘love’ too dangerous. Upa means ‘over,’ and iksha means ‘to look.’ You climb the mountain to be able to look over the whole situation, not bound by one side or the other. Recommended Articles: What Is True Love? Love brings us joy and well-being. To develop that capacity, we have to practice looking and listening deeply so that we know what to do and what not to do to make others happy. Get free updates and news about UPLIFT events and films. [Article revised on 27 April 2020.] The Four Qualities of Love Video by Thich Nhat Hanh. They are the four aspects of true love within ourselves and within everyone and everything. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 – 4 Love is patient, love is kind. Finally true scientific research to allay the fears of those doubting Thomases who need evidence. When I was a novice, I could not understand why, if the world is filled with suffering, the Buddha has such a beautiful smile. If we suffer too much, we may be crushed and unable to help. Let's break it down. I have a sense of happiness even when life gets tough for me. In verses 4-7 he shows the practice of love, how love is greater than all spiritual gifts because of its selfless characteristics. For love to be true love, it must contain compassion, joy, and equanimity. We need trees to be healthy. The other love of deep compassion , empathy and joy for peace for our fellow beings all species too, has filled me true happiness for sure. It won’t make you feel afraid or fettered, because it’s all about freedom and forgiveness. email. How can we feel joy for another person when we do not feel joy for ourselves? A deeper definition of mudita is a joy that is filled with peace and contentment. 🙂. Love, compassion, joy, and equanimity are the very nature of an enlightened person. During the lifetime of the Buddha, those of the Brahmanic faith prayed that after death they would go to Heaven to dwell eternally with Brahma, the universal God. You must look deeply in order to see and understand the needs, aspirations, and suffering of the one you love. 4 Love is patient,(A)love is kind. You will become happier, and everyone around you will become happier, also. Keep on going, you’re headed in a good direction. As I have a true love for my son. 9. ORIGINALLY APPEARED ON CREATIVE BY NATURE. I love you all my brothers and sisters ;). This is the interbeing nature of the Four Immeasurable Minds. But I prefer the word ‘love.’ Words sometimes get sick and we have to heal them. The Lotus Sutra describes Avalokiteshvara as the bodhisattva who practices “looking with the eyes of compassion and listening deeply to the cries of the world.” Compassion contains deep concern. They live to satisfy themselves and use their loved one to help them fulfill that. Watch all the UPLIFT films free on our new video platform! By UPLIFT on Thursday September 17th, 2015, The teachings on love given by the Buddha are clear, scientific, and applicable… Love, compassion, joy, and equanimity are the very nature of an enlightened person. We’re going to focus mainly on verses 4-7, where Paul describes how love acts. If you enjoy sitting meditation, practice sitting meditation. The Four Qualities of Love, by Thich Nhat Hanh 5 years ago No Comments “The teachings on love given by the Buddha are clear, scientific, and applicable… Love, compassion, joy, and equanimity are the very nature of an enlightened person. There are four key characteristics to love that Peter lists: 1. You love in a way that all your children receive your love, without discrimination. 3 Characteristics Of Platonic Love. Thank you for this article. I am a professional blogger and writer keen on sharing my knowledge and views on relationships and personal improvement. Therefore, in order to attract true love, we must exhibit the qualities we seek in our partners. 7 It always protects, … Doctors, for instance, can relieve their patients’ suffering without experiencing the same disease in themselves. Compassion is karuna in both languages. This is all correct! Christians and non-Christians alike are great at expressing what I call "cultural niceness" — like superficial greetings. The first aspect of true love is maitri (metta, in Pali), the intention and capacity to offer joy and happiness. When we understand someone deeply, even someone who has done us harm, we cannot resist loving him or her. I ask this question in all sincereness and respectfully. We have been using the word ‘love’ to mean appetite or desire, as in ‘I love hamburgers.’ We have to use language more carefully. 4 Characteristics of Cambodian People Make You Love Them . Take your Bible and look at the thirteenth chapter of 1 Corinthians, 1 Corinthians chapter 13. That’s why your partner will be drawn to you in the first place — … It is as natural as the air. Upeksha has the mark called samatajñana, “the wisdom of equality,” the ability to see everyone as equal, not discriminating between ourselves and others. Love infuses meaning into every aspect of life. “When our hearts are small, our understanding and compassion are limited, and we suffer. 4) The Assumption This marian dogma was proclaimed by Pope Pius XII on November 1, 1950 on his Encyclical Munificentissimus Deus. 4 Important Characteristics About Love. If our love does not bring joy to both of us, it is not true love. Commentators explain that happiness relates to both body and mind, whereas joy relates primarily to mind. As long as we see ourselves as the one who loves and the other as the one who is loved, as long as we value ourselves more than others or see ourselves as different from others, we do not have true equanimity. The teachings on love given by the Buddha are clear, scientific, and applicable… Love, compassion, joy, and equanimity are the very nature of an enlightened person. Would love your thoughts, please comment. The relationship is a place to practice love. Once your account is created, you'll be logged-in to this account. We have been using the word “love” to mean appetite or desire, as in “I love hamburgers.” We have to use language more carefully. The teachings on love given by the Buddha are clear, scientific, and applicable. They rob their loved one of his liberty, until he can no longer be himself. We can develop this wonderful source of energy, nurturing the unconditional love that does not expect anything in return. The teachings on love given by the Buddha are clear, scientific, and applicable. The root of love for ourselves and others is friendship. It is easy to see how the four qualities of love are intertwined. Anything other than that, mi amor, is not love. 1. (B)5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking,(C)it is not easily angered,(D)it keeps no record of wrongs. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. I’m so grateful to have seen this when I did. If you enjoy walking meditation, practice walking meditation. If we all loved each other as we love ourselves, the world would be a much better place to live! We have a lot of understanding and compassion and can embrace others. Upeksha is the dimension I find hardest until I remember to love myself first. Karuna is usually translated as ‘compassion,’ but that is not exactly correct. They are the four aspects of true love within ourselves and within everyone and everything. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. Joy is mudita. Relationship Design. People who do not understand Buddhism sometimes think upeksha means indifference, but true equanimity is neither cold nor indifferent. One word can give comfort and confidence, destroy doubt, help someone avoid a mistake, reconcile a conflict, or open the door to liberation. One thought can do the same, because thoughts always lead to words and actions. Remember, love is appreciation, happiness, and giving. Dwelling in mindfulness, we can touch these wondrous and refreshing things, and our mind of joy arises naturally. In order to be loved, we have to love, which means we have to understand. Keep in mind I thought I had been in love before. When the Buddha told the Brahman man to practice the Four Immeasurable Minds, he was offering all of us a very important teaching. But preserve your Jewish, Christian, or Muslim roots. In Buddhism, the primary meaning of love is friendship. If you have more than one child, they are all your children. The unifying trait of all of them is the unity between the “self” and the “others”, and the realisation that no such distinction exists. We also get your email address to automatically create an account for you in our website. True love is a source of inexplicable joy and it brings us closer to ourselves in the first place, simply because it removes ego and helps us understand what’s really important in life. They are the four aspects of true love within ourselves and within everyone and everything. A simple way to sum it up would be: be a good friend, full stop.. Henry Drummond explains that at the beginning of this chapter we have love contrasted; in the heart of it, we have love analysed and towards the end we have love defended as the supreme gift.. Love contrasted The description of love in 1 Corinthians 13 is one of the most beautiful and best-known passages in the entire New Testament. I was changed for the better for being loved by him and for loving him. Here’s what true love feels like: 1. A vihara is an abode or a dwelling place. 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